The German national soccer team wasn’t the only one sucking balls last night. The Museums Quartier in Vienna had me really excited. They set up these giant pink soccer nets with the words “Homo: Foul” written across them, saying it was an exhibit on homosexuality in football (soccer, for all of you CUH-RAAAAZY Americans out there). The reason it was put on display now is because of the Europa Meisterschaft, which upon a quick google I have come to the realization that in English is called UEFA EURO 2008. I’m just going to call it the EM.
I thought this would be a really bitchin’ exhibit, or at least somewhat educational. The exhibit was first recommended to me by a woman by the name of Ewa Dziedzec, a lesbian woman who works for the Green Party here in Austria. I had organized an interview with her to discuss homosexual marriage in Europe for a paper/presentation I’m giving two weeks from now. In the interview I asked her what she thought was more important, events like the Pride Parade (Austria: Rainbow Parade, Germany: Christopher Street Day) or exhibits such as the one she had mentioned. She said both were important and that it would be impossible to decide which to get rid of; some people like going to big events like the Rainbow Parade and some people like going to museums. Well, normally I would agree, but like I said, it sucked balls. Here was a chance to bring some education about gays having to hide their identity in sports across the world and what was the exhibit really? A bunch of posters. It was 33 posters designed by people Europe-wide with the message that homophobia is indeed a bad thing.
That’s all well and good, but they had such a fantastic opportunity! Why am I not seeing any education on the subject of homosexuality? Two days ago in my history class I learned that while there are memorials for every group of “minorities” placed into concentration camps across Austria, there is only one group that doesn’t have a memorial: the queers. I mean, they even gave the Jews a memorial! Of all people!
Okay. Maybe I shouldn’t be making Holocaust jokes in a blog about how there needs to be more public education about tolerance, but for some reason it just seemed to fit. Seriously, does anyone think we’ll actually forget about the Jews? They sure do complain about it enough.
Ok I’ll stop I’ll stop.
If you would like to check out some of the posters, feel free to do so here:
http://diestandard.at/?url=/?id=1207285718988
These are all the posters that were on display. Yeah, so you don’t even have to go to the exhibit to see them. What’s worse is that while the giant pink net is eye-catching, it just screams out the damn clichés, which happens to be the same problem I have with the Pride Parade. It’s all about clichés and pushing products and/or politicians.
Last night I was in the Fan Zone in between the city hall and the Burgtheater. They have some giant screens set up and tons of fans showed up from Germany, Austria, Croatia, and Poland. It was really awesome to be there for the intense atmosphere of the crowd, though it’s too bad Germany sucked and gave up two goals to Croatia. When the Austria game started this fat Austrian with a giant foam hat and large Austrian flag screamed, “90% of the Austrian fans are fags! I’m a real fan!”
We need sports players to come out of the closet. They need to show they have balls, but more importantly they need to show very fat very non-athletic jerks like this guy that queers can kick ass, too. The queer youth needs more role models than just Cher and Ellen Degeneres. I mean, Ellen’s great and all, but to use a cliché (if the parade can do it, I can do it), our flag is a freaking rainbow. We need to show that we come in all colors, not just neon pink.
A couple of queer soccer fans
So Angsty!
PS I want to promote an “emerging” artist that I like. Jay Brannan (who you all undoubtedly know from the John Cameron Mitchell movie Shortbus) is releasing his first album on July 15th. He’s also coming to Chicago on July 28th, so you should totally grab tickets (at 15 bucks a pop) and check him out. It’s an all ages show so you should bring your kid sister. I’m sure she’ll love angsty emo/folk music with titles such as “I Want to be A Housewife” and “goddamned.”
You can buy tickets here:
http://www.ticketweb.com/t3/sale/SaleEventDetail?dispatch=loadSelectionData&pl=&eventId=267579
And you can check out his music here:
http://youtube.com/user/jaybrannan
Liam Reed: 1987 model, runs fairly well, few dents, starts in cold weather, no baggage, loves flea markets and canned soup. Send all hate mail, love mail, and sexual advances to withtongue@gmail.com
Comments
Mary Z (Mary Z) says:
(Posted June 14th, 2008 at 1:25 am)
You’re wearing your german fireman shirt! You look so cute!
I mean.
Manly.
You look manly.
Liamz (Liamz) says:
(Posted June 14th, 2008 at 3:00 am)
Mike, a lot of what you have to say is true, but I think a lot of it reinforces stereotypes that gays are only about getting ass. For example:
“You dress two guys up in skin tight spandex that leave little to the imagination and you have to grab and rub just about every part of the other guy’s body to get him to the ground. Its a gay man’s paradise.”
Personally, my idea of paradise is being able to travel the world freely without having to pay for anything I want. But I don’t want the world to be communist (good on paper, not in practice) so these rules would only apply to me. And people on the street would always rush up to me and shout, “Oh dearest Liam! Would you like a cup of coffee? How bout a nice massage? Perhaps peanut butter and jelly? A block of cheese, mayhaps?”
Screw the leotards.
Mike Consalvo (Mike Consalvo) says:
(Posted June 14th, 2008 at 1:07 pm)
Yeah, I know it reinforces stereotypes, but it was a comedic attempt at not only ripping on sports for being so homophobic but also to show that gays and athletes are not so different and therefore homophobia can be overcome.
Oh, and you do look cute and bonus points because the shirt almost looks like Robin’s shirt from Batman and Robin.
Cowboyrob (Cowboyrob) says:
(Posted February 20th, 2009 at 5:52 am)
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Liam Reed
1987 model, runs fairly well, few dents, starts in cold weather, no baggage, loves flea markets and canned soup. Send all hate mail, love mail, and sexual advances to withtongue@gmail.com
Mike Consalvo (Mike Consalvo) says:
(Posted June 14th, 2008 at 12:01 am)
If sports were a person, it would be a closet homosexual. Think about it. I see more ass grabbing on a football field than in a gay porn. I’m not kidding about that. And, then there is the whole relationship between the center and the QB, in which the QB sticks his hands practically up the center’s ass. Just look at all the grabbing and horseplay in a football game. The goal is to GRAB the other guy and throw him down to the ground. Its just like gay S&M. Piles and piles of guys on top of each other, asses on top of other guys faces, genitals rubbing together………..what could be anymore gay than that? Want more? How about all the hugging when a team wins? And there is even kissing. Magic Johnson and Isiah Thomas used to kiss each other (again, I’m not making this up) before each game. After the Sox won the World Series, Ozzie Guillen kissed another guy (I don’t remember who). Than there is the showering. These men all shower and walk around naked together. And how about the uniforms. The only people more hung up than gay people about their clothes are athletes. Everybody has to dress EXACTLY alike, you know, just like a Broadway chorus line. And have you seen the moves in football after player makes a great play? A lot of those dance moves would hold up well in a gay nightclub, as we know, every gay guy (EXCEPT me) can dance. And what about the singing and acting? Gay guys LOVE to sing and act and every time I open the paper, another pro athlete is coming out with another (bad) album or (really bad) acting in some movie or show. And then there is the lying about their age to try to be younger. In baseball a few years ago, there was a rash of players who lied about their ages to try to be younger, much like a 35 year old gay guy I worked with at AAA who was “27″. And have you seen these people dress off the field? Mink coats. Boas. Flashy jewelry. They dress so flamboyant, they would make Elton John blush. And of course, you have wrestling (not the bullshit WWF kind, although that is pretty gay too). You dress two guys up in skin tight spandex that leave little to the imagination and you have to grab and rub just about every part of the other guy’s body to get him to the ground. Its a gay man’s paradise. And they are all hung up on their looks too, just like gay guys. Take boxers for example. They are so concerned about their weight and looking good. “Oh shit, I gained 3/4 of a pound!!! NOOOOOO!!!!”. Because they will be wearing nothing but shorts (fancy shorts too, another sign) they have to have great bodies with little to no hair. Also, don’t fuck with their face. “No, not my face!!! Hit me in the body, please, but don’t mess my face!” They even have to wear a mouthguard to protect their precious teeth! And, a lot of athletes are bitches. Some of these guys whine more than the gayest gay guys. Crying about not having enough money or playing time. Pissing and moaning about being disrespected. But, the biggest thing is the homophobia. Athletes are afraid of gays and a male sports team has never had an out gay player. They are so afraid of gays, they often say they would beat the shit out of a gay teammate and/or they would not stand for a gay teammate in the locker room. Need I say more, that’s like the first sign that somebody is gay………everybody knows the biggest closet cases are homophobic people.