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George Carlin Is Dead, or Mark Twain, Lenny Bruce, and Richard Pryor Have The Fourth For Their Card Games In Heaven

posted by Carl Newman at 12:20 pm.

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George Carlin died (which I am disappointed in the coverage of). I remember being nine years old and downloading all of Jammin’ in New York with my friends and memorizing every word of it. George taught us how to swear, (and by the way, my grandmother stopped reading my blog because I’m such a potty mouth) and he also taught us what funny was and how to find it.

“I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.”

When it comes to someone like George Carlin, there is no such thing as hyperbole. Allow me to expound.

Here’s how important George Carlin is: Before Carlin, people thought Bob Hope was the funniest guy ever.

Repeat: Before George Carlin, people thought Bob Hope was funny.

Then they saw George and realized he was the funniest fucking guy ever (and there would be no “fucking” in that sentence if it weren’t for George Carlin).

If you could express humor in terms of geography, and The Funniest Place In The Universe is home plate at Yankee Stadium, then Richard Pryor is at bat, Carlin is the catcher, and Lenny Bruce is the umpire. Eddie Izzard is in a skybox, and I am (generously) in the west end.

Of Cleveland, Ohio.

Carlin changed what comedy was. It became, under his leadership with a few others, the most important form of social criticism today. Carlin’s humor had one basic premise:

People are completely full of shit, and I can prove it.

Carlin forced people to examine nonsense that they put up with because it is easier to swallow the bullshit of life than it is to question, and life’s hard enough without having to worry about the self-important language of airline announcements. Not that anything Carlin ever talked about seemed like “light” subject matter.

Of course, I still think I haven’t heard a legitimate defense of war since Carlin described the first Gulf War as a bunch of men in the desert, waving their pricks at one another to see who’s was bigger. And pacifism gets a reputation for being a bunch of softies like John Lennon and the Dali Lama anyway, so warhawks have a tendency to characterize them as a pack of pussies. And we were lucky to have George change the image of pacifism from “Give Peace A Chance” to “Hey, Dick Cheney! Go Fuck Yourself!”

Carlin was one of the greatest skeptics of the twentieth century, and having made it only eight years into this century, is yet to have a true peer in skepticism or comedy in the twenty-first. Further, anyone who does rival him will be one of his own disciples in comedy. And that’s a legacy he can be proud of, although if I suggested that to his face he would say,

“Hey blog-man, you limp-dick cocksucker. Why don’t you let me decide what, if anything, my life means. You can go back to writing about burritos, you no-talent, self-righteous, condescending shithead.”

Rest In Comedic Rage, George.

Carl Newman: appreciates when you don't feel like commenting, but still want to tell him what an asshole he is at warriorpoetresponds@gmail.com